while i do have a vast array of peculiar stories in my arsenal, there comes a time when the last hidden surprise must be revealed. i've fired off many of them here on this blog. today i blasted one across the lunch table.
the air was of the solid sort and there was a hot pocket on my plate. it was agreed by everyone that i have "the weirdest things" happen to me. i'm always amazed by that. granted i've had a years worth of half hour intervals to share a few bits so they do have a shortened view of who i am. but i still took it as a challenge. some of you may remember a story i had started a long while ago. i never finished it here because in the midst of telling it, it started up again. but it was a tease and it thrilled me for a moment before dropping face first into absolutely nothing. some highlights of the story involved a rehab, some cops, a car chase, a stake out, some madness and a girl.
so there i was rambling out this story, because for some reason i don't seem to care what anyone knows about me. granted i gave them the abridged version and culled the cussing. polished up just a little but still with a few rough edges. when it was done....i was left with the distinct impression that i had just made many people uncomfortable. which made me uncomfortable. later i asked one of the girls that i had told this story to if maybe that wasn't the sort of thing one tells at work (specifically at that work place because this never occurred anywhere else i've worked. course i've never had to pull 'business casual' out of my ass before either). she told me "maybe not".
the truth of the matter is that while laws were broken, felonies were charged, hands were cuffed, i did nothing wrong. but i introduced them second hand to things like homeless people, dyfs, violence and a very distinct existence of life on the other side of legal. or rather i erased the line that divided it just a touch.

my point is, that one of the first times i was me, without boundaries, i managed to distance myself from the people i work with, to isolate myself just a bit more. and i noticed how superficial the "friendships" at work are.


these are just the murmurings of one who is once again unable to sleep. pay no heed.

Comments

MiCheleLynnX said…
Yea, I hate that superficial-ness...it's such a double standard isn't it? That's what sucks about it.

People will tell you anything and it's cool but if you tell them something, it might be all weird.

They are the fucking freaks, not you dude.
Mr Anigans said…
i'm usually pretty good at feeling people out and knowing where that line is and how far i can cross it. but there are (is?) so much office politics going on in this place that i can taste the bile and i have difficulty gauging where reality ends and social politics begin.
glomgold said…
Ha. I watched an interview of Eddie Griffin w/ Conan a long while back. Eddie was talking about how he'd gone shark cage-diving. While underwater in the cage, at the moment he saw a shark suddenly appear, he joked that he gave himself a "hot pocket". Kind of a Baby Ruth in the wetsuit sort of thing.
Number Mouth said…
I hate the flavor of bile.

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